Common Break Up Reasons - Part 2

Red Flag #6: It is Impossible to Fit a Square Peg in a Round Hole

When you’re unhappy with your relationship, the most logical thing to do is to end it.  One of the red flags that lead to unhappiness and a failed relationship is incompatibility. Having things in common with another person is often what triggers the start of a relationship. But it’s a well known fact that people do change and when people change differences are born. One incompatibility can become two and then multiply to eight and so on, causing a couple to become strained.

Do you remember the Beatles? Better yet, do remember that song that says all you need is love? Well, it’s true. You have to understand that being in a relationship means accepting and loving someone for who they are.  It also means performing actions that will make your loved one happy.  Though it’s a strange concept to grasp, the truth is that when you make someone happy it spawns an even deeper love.

Ceasing any efforts of making one another happy is the first step to a faulty relationship. Forgetting why you loved your significant other is the next. If you’re feeling like the fire in your relationship is dying down, breathe some life back into it with random acts of kindness and a shower of love.

Red Flag #7: "You" and "Me" Everyday, All Day

Getting bored is a part of every human’s nature and when you’re bored it spurs you into looking for greener and more exciting pastures. This problem is actually more common in the younger couples because of the lack of a solid identity which makes them needy.  It’s great if you just can’t get enough of each other but keep in mind that absence really does make the heart grow fonder.

The reason why this lack of space is so conducive to break-ups is that once the falling in love is over, staying in love becomes harder. You come to the realization that your life consists of only your partner and you’ve alienated many friends and family.  This often leads to one person or the other tucking tail and ending the relationship quickly.  A certain level of independence must be maintained in order for the relationship to succeed.

Red Flag #8: Maturing at an Unequal Rate

I cringe every time I remind myself that this red flag exists because it’s usually the usual cause of problems in my relationships.

In most cases, when you step into a relationship, you and your partner are at roughly at the same point in life. Despite being at a similar age and time in your lives though, there is often one person in a relationship that matures or grows at a quicker rate. It’s like one of those race horse games at the carnival.  You’re gunning the speed of your prancing horse, eyes on the prize, while your partner couldn’t care less if he or she wins and takes a while to finish the race.

When you kick off the relationship, you’re both probably “couch potatoes” but as time goes on, one of you is bound to move past that stage and will want to get a move on.  Keep in mind that your partner is someone that mirrors who you have become and when that person doesn’t show you the things that you want to see, you’re probably going to that “loose strand” off.

Red Flag #9: Firing Up the Emotional Oven of Doom

Though sad, it’s true that many women are on the emotional, borderline depressive side of the spectrum.  Yes, men do get overly emotional at times, but it’s more common amongst women. It’s usually the nice guys that draw these women in by the dozen and the same goes for the nice girls out there.

To make things easier for you, understanding the personalities of men or women is simply broken down into two separate categories: aggressive and passive.  Having two of the same kinds of personalities is, in short, a recipe for disaster. Two aggressive personalities is pitting fire against fire thus making things too hot to control. On the off side, two passive personalities is something along the lines of dull.

The higher the intensity of emotions, the more aggressive the personality of a person is. Having a partner with a more passive personality is a great way to balance things out.  Don’t get too excited though, just because someone with a passive personality can take on emotions, there’s always a boiling point to every relationship.

Keep your emotions in check when you need to so that you avoid unnecessary arguments. If you don’t deal with issues like this, it just turns into that giant elephant in the room that no one’s talking about and it’s bound to lead to a rotting relationship.

“Most couples have not had hundreds of arguments; they've had the same argument hundreds of times.” ~ GAY HENDRICKS:

Red Flag #10: Runaway Brides and Grooms

Ah, commitment; the big C word that is equivalent to the kiss of death for some relationships. Now, I don’t want to go pointing any fingers, but this one is a problem most commonly attributed to the men in relationships. Girls, don’t go throwing a party though. Some of you are guilty of this as well.

It’s not exactly a walk in the park to figure out the compartmentalized brain of the male species. But if you want to get down to the basics, forcing a man to commit when he’s not ready is just as bad as throwing a leash on them. When dealing with either a man or a woman with commitment issues, the best way to go about things is to stop focusing on how you’re going to get them to settle down with you.

Do you know how mouse traps work? The cheese baits the mouse inside the trap and then the cage slams shut leaving the mouse no way to escape. Now, visualize any one with commitment issues and imagine them to be a mouse with a human sized brain.  They want the prize – the cheese in this case – badly. But they know that if they take it, they’re trapped.
 
Freedom is vital to anyone afraid of commitment.  To ensure that you don’t scare your partner off in your relationship, take things slow.  If you rush things and try to coerce your partner into commitment when he or she isn’t ready, he or she is going to shoot out of that relationship like a firecracker.

Are you frustrated in your attempt to get your ex back?

• Do you find that getting back your ex is an uphill task that last forever?
• Do you feel like your situation is impossible or reached a point of no return?
• Do you feel lost and cannot go on because of a breakup?
• Do you constantly check your email and voice mail to see if he/she called
• Are you feeling massively depressed
  
  If your answer to the above questions are filled with yesses, then I strongly recommend that you check out The Ex Recovery System.

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